I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
