Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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