Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
