i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
