why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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