Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
