party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
