yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
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