I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
She's JV to your varsity
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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