I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize