I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Panties = found
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
