i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize