don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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