'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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