Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
