i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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