yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
