Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
