He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
pop tarts are not kleenex
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
