Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
