Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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