sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
