Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
