the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
My boob is missing a layer of skin
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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