Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
