my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Randomize
