HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
