You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
