there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
