How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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