Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
