WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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