I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
he just fucked me for my cheese..
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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