on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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