at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
