hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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