Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
