i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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