Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize