i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
i out mim tonsoeep
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
