That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
