absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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