So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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