I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
