a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
