420 ftw
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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