my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
