What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
