my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize