none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
